I bade goodbye

to the place i helped build.

and onwards i go.

i tend to hold on to the past but i've learnt to slowly let it go.

and i walked out of the place i've booked in and out for the last 1 year 3 months.

--------------------------------------------------



我站在十字路口对抗心痛一个人

--------------------------------------------------

林宥嘉 shook my senses. Very very 感情丰富的音色，带点激动，却不是呐喊。带点感伤，却不是无奈。

很久没有这样的歌手了。

--------------------------------------------------

Last working day of my 2 years I'll never get back

But it was fun, looking back, for me.

It's always fun when looking back.

I am subjected to a rather higher than normal degree of nostalgia.

And I'm so used to the slow paced life.

Thank you all for making my NS memorable, and livable.

-----------------------------------------

You always talk differently when you're emo.

My radar may not be very functional but being jumpy at every signal I deem abnormal, I might be right some of the times.

If you realised who am I talking about then

"Just stay happy, I'd stick around for as long as you need me to."

next, I'm gonna say something emo.

v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v


"Something Emo."

I warned you didn't I.

------------------------------

Who frequently go vivo 2nd floor Pacific Coffee Company?

I heard from rumor.com it's not bad a ... place.

------------------------------

I'm going to sleep now.

And wake up 1.5 hours later to my final 0.5 day in sembawang camp.

Seems like cold treatment is the in thing now.

眼前的黑不是黑
你说的白是什么白
人们说的天空蓝
是我记忆中那团白云背后的蓝天

我望向你的脸
却只能看见一片虚无
是不是上帝在我眼前遮住了帘
忘了掀开

i'm sure you thought *

i didn't need to sleep.

i pray that i'm able to muster enough mental strength to study.
---------------------------------------------------
* that i'm not noticing it.

but did you know that, the "subtle" hint dropped through the recent change of tone was received better than you might have thought?

no time then, i could totally understand. school, reports, teaching, exams, family had to be squeezed into what's left of the already little time.

no matter how last minute our meal is canceled, i know that very important matters had to be attended to because i sensed the worry.

never did i mind you ending an email/msn/sms conversation like that. because i knew about the busy schedule and i'm just being at the wrong place and wrong time.

it just takes a little time to get used to it by not pacing back and forth checking com/phone every 5 minutes.

i'm glad that you made it through the degree course. i'm sure that the final exams that ended months ago had taken a toll on you. take a well deserved break with family and bffs!

for now, good luck with the resume and interviews too. but i'm sure you can do it like you always did anyway~~ =)

i know i have the uncanny ability to strike the wrong chord at the wrong time at amazing accuracy and frequency. maybe it's just with you i guess.

again i really didn't mean it that way, the "who you watched with lol?" question i asked.

i know the reason for all these but i really didn't want to acknowledge it. i didn't want the memory to fade away.

it's like becoming a seasonal thing where it grew and fell before it bloomed. one too many times.

it wasn't the negativity this time. my negativity. i was careful and it was easier(but a sad fact) as it wasn't face to face.

hence. it's the person himself.

as always.

i wanted to chat

but i can never know whether you're thinking

"=) hey it's you!"

or

"you again"

or

"i'd just reply out of courtesy"

----------

i hate flying cockroaches.

記憶を捜すこと

Je ne peux pas vivre sur seules des mémoires...

------------------------------------------------

sleep early i am.

I'm here without A.

Don't think i can.

---------------------------------------

Chopper is super cute!


---------------------------------------

I will have to brace myself.

because it has really come true. all my fears my thoughts my foretold situation.

even after the exams, nothing returned to normal but in fact it never was.

i have to come to realise that, A will never be A ever again.

------------------------------------------------------------------

and i have an uncanny ability to hit her in the wrong chord with alarming accuracy.

frequently.

"i've done it again didn't i?"

what she wants me to know she'll tell me.
what she wants me to know she'll tell me.
what she wants me to know she'll tell me.

which is not very often.

a careless question about the ironman movie, "you are very well informed!!(about the preview to next movie AFTER the long long ending credits), who did you watched with sia?"

because to know this you gotta be really a
1)movie siao
2)people who are into such guy stuff

and i have sorta ruined the rare chances i get to chat.

yet again.

cos' i realised that it was being misunderstood that i am probing. not that im not curious but, i really didnt mean it that way.

i never felt so... lost for words ever.

things seemed fine after that but a nail hit in leaves a mark when removed.

what she wants me to know she'll tell me.
what she wants me to know she'll tell me.

"but as friends, some qns are to probing to be asked".

i really didnt mean it that way, only to realise it after the frosty reply.

what she wants me to know she'll tell me.

but as friends.

yes. i realised.
you'd too.
if you'd come so near and being shot point blank with it.

if ya din want me to know, i really would understand, cos who am i?

"i wished upon a wishing star.
i wished upon a wishing well.
i wished upon a wishing lake.
i wished upon a wishing tree.
not realising,
all i've done,
was to wish it away."

---------------------------------------------------

(ps im not brick nor stone. dont tell me you wouldnt guess who were or was it.)
1) her bro
2) her bffs (highly unlikely)
3) yup. who else?

---------------------------------------------------

i need some golden sauza. "to forget" i heard some one say. sure as hell it will last for the long torturing sleep.

i need to have happier postings.

i'm ord-ing soon! oh! wow! yay! heh! woohoo!

i'm happy to just have a healthy dosage of thoughts of A a day! and still able too =)

i'm grateful for the water i drank, the food i ate, the desserts i tasted, the air i breathed!

i'm so so so elated of being alive!

i'm so very consoled that i have people to speak to during the cold times whenever i needed a listening ear!

i'm so very grateful that i have people to walk with me during the dark times whenever i felt like K'ing M 'Self!!

i feel great to be sleeping properly every day!

it is my blessing to be able to still give thanks!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
也许事与愿违。
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

eh eh was blog reading and came across this from a friend's post today:

Missing you is my hobby,
Caring for you is my job,
Making you happy is my duty,
and,
Loving you is my life.

abit meat numb, but worth a few cents of thoughts.

----------------------------------------------------------------

i saw this job posting~~~

Brand Marketing Executive

Salary: up to $4500

Our client, an European leading fashion brand is hiring Brand Marketing Executive.

Responsibilities:
-Formulation and execution of marketing plan
-Development of creative advertising and effective sales promotion programmes.
-Planning and execution of marketing events

Requirements:
-Diploma/Degree in Marketing or Business Management
-Self motivated and good working attitude.
-Strong interpersonal skill and possess creative flair
-Able to travel to Europe (Milan) for short-middle term business meetings

Work location:
-Town

Salary:
-$3,000 to $4,500 (with experience)
-$1,800 to $2,500 (fresh graduates)

if what it says is true, this is the true essence of marketing at work as per foreign context.

but, fesyen to me is ok but i do not have in depth knowledge.

i am, however, very interested in the formulation, development and planning of marketing plans and events.

gonna complete my CB-ish CV soon.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

this phone is darn cool....





need an ord phone.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wonder how's A doing?

If my presence is not required

Just let me know.

I'd understand why. =)

For just one more moment with you

Don't take too long to say
I love you to the ones you love
Cause time has a habit of slipping away

And out on the clear blue sky
When lightning strikes on a sunny day
Just take me in and keep me from the rain

And the words that seem so hard to say
Come out when you've gone away
Just stay a little while and hear me say

That I want you here tonight
And I need you by my side
For just one more moment
For just one more moment with you

Turn away to say goodbye
With each and every word that passes by
Like a distant memory

And time keeps slipping away
And time will turn to grey
And time will be the one who holds you down

And the words that seem so hard to say
Come out when you've gone away
Just stay a little while and hear me say

That I want you here tonight
And I need you by my side
For just one more moment
For just one more moment

That I want you here tonight
And I need you by my side
For just one more moment
For just one more moment with you

Sometimes time will treat you bad
Before you even know what's wrong
And in the end it hits you hard
Please tell me you'll be strong

Sometimes time will treat you bad
Before you even know what's wrong
And in the end it hits you hard
Please tell me you'll be strong

------------------------------------------

I'd give anything.

海鸟跟鱼相爱

只是意外一场.





你的笑容勉强不来

------------------------------------

=) hope ur exams were done with colours flying.
the day im looking forward to
the day i've feared since 3 months ago.

so. im holding on to me as best as i could.

43 hours since last duty. 5 coffees, 2 square meals and many snacks in between.
6 hours since i've managed to do out a report.
5 hours since i've handed it in.
3 hours since i've got home.
2 hours since the song kept playing.
1 hour since the line stuck in me.

tml a friend from thailand is coming to visit.

a good reason to small pour 2 cups. =)

almost

lost it today.

traces and trails ends/ending

i've finished eclipse. a darn nice series. looking forward to 'breaking dawn'.

and i felt lost. like i've lost trail.

pinning my hopes on her graduation.

if things can get different.

--------------------------------------

decommissioning outing was fun. banshee's mpv gonna be decommissioned. hmm. monkey poaching was half successful. gonna be fully equipped the next time.

--------------------------------------

need to start working on my project today/sunday.

--------------------------------------

若是觉得痛，又怎么会空虚？
若是觉得空虚，又是哪儿来的痛？
不过怎么胸口就是觉得空空的，
又在隐隐作痛呢？

--------------------------------------

我只希望你能开心。
是不是有我的开心已经是其次了。

ouch. this hurts.

你看著我说千万不要__上你

因为你只会让我伤心别傻了快点喊停

你那麼冷静

忽远又忽近


只想__你

好想每天睁开眼睛就能看到你

我知道我偶尔有一点任性

不管你做任何决定

究竟爱我还是逃避

Sorry

我还是不会放弃

__你
----------------------------------------------

although i have refused to admit it

our clock seemed to have stop ticking since ... ...

i don't know.

----------------------------------------------

"there was a bear who was too huge to climb the tree to get his honey.
the bear went to a cave for a couple of years and out came a bear which wasn't as big.
the bear thought if it could climb the tree now, he would finally taste the honey.
the bear climbed the tree.
but the honey wasn't there.
because the honey is on the higher branch.
the bear thought it could reach it anyway.
the bear inched towards the honey, the reason it'd been in the cave.
the bear kept slipping, but inch by inch the bear climbed.
but it seems that the honey is eluding the bear.
avoiding the advance albeit being sweet still.
the bear is tired.
the bear lost grip.
the bear fell.
the bear landed.
the bear never regretted scaling the tree.
but the bear thought that
it doesn't matter
before or after the cave
it still don't make a difference"

----------------------------------------------

it never did.

the rightful owner of the 6610

i borrowed it 2 years ago. panicky i was before the enlistment day, asked around who has spare non camera phone. terry lent me his.

2 years later, i am returning the 6610 to it's rightful owner, cos he's the one going in now.

it felt familiar, only that i'm ord-ing this time.

heh. i still remember the night before he rode his bike here and passed me the phone. this time it'll be the same i guess, except that i'll be passing it back to him.

which means, i need a new phone. i'm eyeing k850i. god of toto!!! how??

---------------------------------------------

"sorry

wrong person."

ouch. how cold can it get.